Wednesday, August 29, 2012

So you say I'm a SuperMom...

The question I get asked most often is "How do you do it all?" I even had a close friend call me SuperMom the other day! Wha????? This is one of those questions that I always have a hard time answering, but I'm going to try and do that today.  

I work 40+ hours a week (on a semi-flexible schedule), have 2 kids, maintain a busy household and exercise 5-6 days a week.  I understand why people ask the question because often times I don't know how I do it.  The quick answer is that it's not easy.  Many weeks I find myself at the end of my rope, exhausted and barely keeping it together.  Other weeks seems to fly by like the breeze; easy and forgiving.

If there's anything I've learned in the last year it's that there are some things I can control and other things I cannot.  I'd like to focus in on these because I really believe being able to discern between these 2 things just makes everything easier as you set out to make your dreams reality.  

First, let's talk about the things I can control:
I can control how much time I put into the housework.
I can control what goes in my mouth and make an effort to plan ahead.
I can control my work schedule (to an extent).
I can control what I want my priorities to be.
I can control my mind, my thoughts and my own energy.
I can control what it's going to take to get me to my goals.

The things I can't control:
I can't control the unexpected.
I can't control  the uncontrollable.  
(sounds simple, right? Well, it is!!)

I think a lot of times (we Moms especially) think that we must live up to this super high standard. A standard that for most of us is unattainable.  A week or so ago I was having a conversation with a friend about housework.  She grew up with a mom that stayed home and the house was always immaculate.  My friend works full-time in a demanding job and also has 2 little ones to wrangle.  She wanted to know how I did it. How could I keep my house together, workout, eat right, maintain my 40+ hours of work at my job and still remain sane?  Truth is, I focus on the things I can control and don't worry about the things I cannot control.  Having young kids, you probably know that it's like a tornado blew through the house on any given day.  Is my house a disaster area? Maybe to some. Is it spotless? Hardly.  Do I freak out about toys strewn all over the place or the fact that I didn't wipe down the kitchen counter? Not anymore. I spent enough time in my single years focusing on the things that I can't control instead of just letting life happen. 

With the control aspect, comes determination along with it.  You've harnessed the things you want to achieve and then you set out and do them. You've got to JUST DO IT!  Once I set aside what was important to me and what wasn't is when my goals started to become realized. I wasn't fantasizing anymore about them, I was doing them.  I spent 2 hours on Sunday in my kitchen prepping food to eat during a busy work-week.  I got up at 5am to workout if I had to, even if the baby woke up in the middle of the night (see, there's that unexpected part sneaking in!). I budgeted for a house cleaner to take the edge off. I worked extra late at home so I didn't have to spend those hours in the office (flex scheduling helps!). I ask my husband for help when I feel like I'm losing it. I take the things I have power over, and I supercharge them.  Once you figure out what is really important to you all the things around you start to change.  Everything starts to make sense and the pieces fall into place.  Your goals become realized instead of just being a distant dream. 

I'm a bit of a perfectionist, no lyin'.  I still have a hard time letting go of the uncontrollable.  I have slept in instead of worked out. I have fallen off the wagon with my food and exercise. I have let my house get to tornado-zone status. But the next day, I wake up and I decide I'm not going to let the uncontrollable control me. I figure out what needs to change and I get up and I do it.  Consistency pays off. Not only as it pertains to weight loss goals and fitness, but also in life. When you repeat these practices, new habits form.  Your mindset shifts. In letting go of the unnecessary and harnessing the necessary, you become a new person.  I'm not always perfect.  But I can plan to be the best me and then follow through with that until the uncontrollable throws me a curve ball.  How you choose to handle the curve ball is what makes all the difference. 

Now, would I say that I'm Supermom or that I have it all figured out? Absolutely not! I'm human, I'm learning and evolving and I make mistakes.  I fail daily. Bad weeks come with the good ones.  All I can do is be my best and forget the rest.  I have goals, dreams and aspirations and I'm not getting there worrying about what my house looks like or if I ate a piece of unplanned pizza. Make the adjustments, pull up the bootstraps and get to it!

What things in life could you "let go of" to achieve your goals?? 

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